Money Matters in Marriage

One of the blessings of being married in my 20's is having developed the skills to see the "beauty" of money in a mature way. I know others have their own way of managing their money. So far this is how we do it.

1. Pay an Honest Tithe
Marvin Ashton said, "successful financial management in every LDS home begins with the payment of an honest tithe." It is our goal to be honest with our tithes. We've been doing this before we got married so it never became a problem at all.  We just pay out tithes online. Thanks to BPI for making it possible with ease. :D


2. Use a Budget
Even before I got married, I already keep track of my expenses. It requires diligence to really take note of daily expenses to the very cent. It takes 100% discipline to stay on your budget.

Money management when mastered is an accomplishment. Spending patterns is way different when you are single compared to when you you are married. But because I was able to see things in a wider perspective, seriously I was able to save more when I got married.

I usually get hold of the money so I also create a budget plan for certain categories like food, home investment, retirement fund, savings, transportation and  apartment rent. The secret is really to just stick to your budget no matter how enticing advertisements are. It could have been easier to just swipe our credit card but I have never used it even once.


3. Invest Wisely
The best time to prepare for the future is when you are still able to do so. If you are married, you have someone to talk to about financial goals and you will realize that indeed  this is something not to be neglected. Inflation is getting higher so the money we save today will no longer have the same value 10 years from now. Sounds alarming!

We have already started investing for our retirement. And we already planned to add an investment for our future home. Marvin J. Aston said "Work toward home ownership. Home ownership qualifies as an investment, not a consumption. But the type of home your income will support." Homes need not be that expensive. The important thing is you can have something you can call your own. We've been renting and it's simply money out. So we decided to invest in a home we can afford.


4. Keep Emergency Funds
This is so crucial. Tomorrow can be full of uncertainties so better be prepared before it's too late. Emergency funds is emergency funds. It is not a fund to buy shoes or clothes. It's something you need to spare for "emergency".  We just let it sit there but hopefully no emergencies will take place. Hehe.

5. Keep a 72 hour Kit
We should be prepared to have basic needs on hand if calamities happen especially food, clothes, medicines.

6. Save While You Still Can
Are you a saver or a spender? Butch and I are just blessed since we have the right attitude when it comes to finances. I really see to it that we have savings. Remember, savings is savings. Don't move an inch closer to use it to buy stuffs.

6. Reward Yourself Too!
Of course we are working hard so we also reward ourselves. But reward with some limits even if you can afford to buy. Sometimes if I see something in the mall that really attracts me I ask myself if I can afford it. Though the answer most of the time is a yes, a follow up question comes next -- Do I need it? So If the second question is a no, I don't buy it. Though I really love shoes and books I still think twice before buying :D

7. Stay Away from Debt
When Butch and I got married we immediately moved into our apartment by ourselves. Life can just be so simple yet you can feel that extreme joy. As long as we have a lot of food and books we are good. Haha! We don't really have a problem with debt. BPI granted us with a credit card probably because they want us to have a little debt somehow. lol. Sorry BPI we are smarter than you are and thank you for the good credit limit! When we needed a new laptop for work we were contemplating to just charge it to the card and pay the monthly dues. In the end we still ignored that idea and pay the laptop with our own money.

8. Pursue New Skills/Further Education
 I recently enrolled in a cooking and dressmaking class. Our teacher in both classes asked us why did we  enroll in that class. I have  graduated in my 4 year course but there are still other skills I want to improve on especially the homemaking ones. Seriously, I enrolled in cooking class because I want to learn new skills in cooking considering that I prepare our meals three times a day. I also enrolled in dressmaking because clothes for children are more expensive than the ones for adults so I'll just sew clothes for our children. haha! Additional savings! :P Education is an investment though we can't deny the fact that we have to allot money for it. Like in my dressmaking class, I really bought my stuffs.


Everything actually boils down to this : Take control of your money, not the other way around.

Commit To be Self Reliant Early

Just want to share my talk during last Stake Con's Youth and Single Adults Devotional

If you were to pause and think seriously about things you do on a regular basis that would make a positive influence in your life to be more self reliant what would they be?

Two weeks ago we had an orientation to My Path to Self Reliance which really empowered us to evaluate our goals and see what steps we need to do to be more self reliant. Those who have chosen to improve further on their education will be using the new Education for Better Work workbook. Remember that this is not only for those who want to apply for a PEF loan. Even if your family can support your education or even if you think you are already doing well in school, this 6-week workshops can help you to further become an effective student.

President Monson said “I urge you to pursue your education and learn marketable skills so that, should such a situation arise, you are prepared to provide. Your talents will expand as you study and learn. You will be able to better assist your children in their learning, and you will have peace of mind in knowing that you have prepared yourself.”

We are so blessed with the many resources the church has offered through the Self Reliance Services. We must grab the opportunities so we can be more prepared to be self reliant.

Education is a key to opportunities. The world needs men and women of who have the ability, skills and training. Do not short-circuit your education. How far are you doing so far in school?

I want to share with some of the effective ways I have done when I was your age that really helped me to excel in school.


1. Establish good study habits

Set a time each day to study and be sure to follow what you have planned. Don't just study if you have exams the next day. It's always good to be prepared because there might be some projects or school work that you also need to do.

If we study on a regular basis we can also keep the Sabbath day. The tendency if you cram, you may be tempted to do school stuffs on Sundays. I have graduated in college with honors without studying on Sundays. I have also passed the board exams without reviewing on Sundays. The Lord helps those who help themselves and obey his will.


2.  Capture and remember what you learn

Make it a habit to take down notes and review them when you get home while the lessons are still fresh in your memory. I love taking down notes and I still have my high school notes until now. And it can benefit my sister since I have kept the simple formulas in solving trigonometry and algebra problems.

I’ve noticed that majority of our youth today come to classes, activities, devotionals, workshops and even right now without a pen or notebooks. I believe your parents and leaders would want you to look always like a learner not just spectators.

They say the pen is mightier than the the sharpest minds. Human as we are, we sometimes forget but notes can help us recall important principles we learned.


3.  Use Time Wisely

To avoid cramming we should be wise in spending our time and make sure we have completed our assignments.

There will sometimes be immediate, fleeting pleasures that will eat up your time like spending much time on Facebook and other social media platforms. Lost time is lost forever so be productive in any way


4.  Make Seminary/Institute a priority

Seminary and Institute are not just options if we have time. We have to commit to make time for it. Lessons learned in the seminary and institute will prepare us to become better students.

Elder Dallin H Oaks said “Cherish and nourish your spiritual life. Seek spiritual growth at the same time that you are seeking to enlarge your learning in other areas. Nourish your spirit just as regularly as you nourish your body or mind. Don’t neglect study of the gospel and activity in the Church during the period of your schooling. It is needed then as much as or more than at any time during your life”

For those SAs who have finished schooling and are already working, continue to love learning. Those that I have shared are still applicable to you as you work out for further learning opportunities to improve yourselves.

May I add just a few tips on how single adults who are already working can be more self reliant .


5. Learn the art of Money Management

Your future self will thank you if you have the right attitude towards money. We can't deny the fact that money really matters. Elder Dallin H. Oaks mentioned in the Philippine area Special broadcast last week that we can find ways to earn even if we are still in school.

Be a saver because in due time you will get married. Butch and I got married without asking financial assistance from our parents because we have saved enough to get married.

Be a saver rather than a spender. If you are saving at least 50 percent of your income you are way close to establish your emergency funds in time.


6. Be Proactive at Work

Don't just wait for you to be instructed. Being proactive means thinking and acting ahead of anticipated events. You create a plan and see which tasks are priorities


7. Learn New Skills

Do not limit yourselves to just the things you know. Continue to seek new learnings that can help you and your family to be more self reliant.

I know that it is important to start being self reliant during the early stages of your life.

Education is one of the greatest investments that we will have. Though the experience will be challenging most of the time especially if you are already in college, everything will pay off. Our success really depends on our attitude. If we see things in an eternal perspective we will be more motivated to be more diligent.

The Story of My Life

I was born on the 12th day of April.


I studied in Assumption Iloilo from kindergarten to 6th grade, finished high school at Central Philippine University and graduated with a degree in Nursing at West Visayas State University.

I was assigned in Philippines Quezon City Mission as a full time missionary for 18 months.

I got married with my lalabs Butch on the 28th of  June  2013 at Cebu Philippines Temple.

Don't Settle For Anything Less

One of my favorite songs is Happily Ever After by Jenny Phillips. I'm sharing a part of that song below:

It's your time

It's your destiny to shine

So arise

Be true to the royal

That's inside of you

Don't settle for the story that

The world would have you write

You were born to reach eternal life

Let faith fill every chapter

Let the Savior lead you to

Happily ever after

For me, happily ever after happens through constantly making righteous choices in the different aspects of our lives. I'm sharing this not to brag but to inspire others who may be struggling in some chapters of their life. You may find that most of my thoughts are on the LDS point of view.

Chapter 1: Education

There's fulfillment if we excel academically. I've shared in one of my posts about tips that can help students succeed in school. When I got all line of 9 in my high school grades, I discovered what I am capable of. Attitude has a lot to do with getting good grades. Diligence is the key. One teacher once told me "why settle for a grade of 85 if you can go higher than that?"

If you feel frustrated just go into a deeper self exam and see how you can improve. Nothing is impossible if we are dedicated to achieve our goals.

As Latter-Day Saints, we keep the Sabbath Day holy. I have survived Nursing life without scanning my notes on Sundays. I can call it literally as a rest day since it's either we are in school, community or in the hospital from Mondays-Saturdays. I passed the Licensure Exam without studying on Sundays too. My secret? Well, I just established a good study habit. And the Lord took care of the rest. We can still go for the gold without compromising what we believe. Trust me, it's possible to graduate with Latin honors without breaking the Sabbath day.


Chapter 2. Serving a Mission

It's not mandatory for sisters to really serve a mission. But I can attest that sisters are among the hardworking missionaries out there. The experience is all worth it. Serving a mission clarified my vision and priorities in life. I was able to better understand the plan of happiness of our Heavenly Father.

I could have chosen to just work after school, but I think I have still chosen the best part.


Chapter 3. Temple Marriage

Marriage is one decision of which we cannot make a mistake. I have never loose sight of the vision of temple marriage. It's every LDS woman's ultimate goal. There will be diversions along the way that can hinder us only if we allow them to. The best time to decide to marry in the temple is when you're still young. Don't settle for anything less than temple marriage. Your posterity will definitely thank you for staying firm with that single decision.

If we trust the Lord in all our endeavors we can really experience the taste of a happily ever after each single day. There will always be strength beyond our own if we submit to his will and time table.

Is he the One?

I have crushes since then. My first crush was named Jan. He was a classmate of mine in Kinder 2. I always have crushes since then. haha! Well, a crush is a temporary attraction to someone of the opposite sex. We can have bunches of them in our teenage years.

The question that pops when you reach 20′s is “How will I know if HE is the one?" I am a Latter-Day Saint and we have been counseled about this matter. But despite the counsels it’s still challenging at times. It could be that you like this person but there’s something inside that tells you, “Oh he’s not the one”. Sometimes there will be battle of mind over emotions. One lesson I learned, is to see if that someone has the potential to be with you no matter what it takes for eternity.

There’s no such thing as a perfect person. Only Jesus is perfect and he's not on the running.  But you can choose someone who is striving to be like Him. You will end up being single for the rest of your life if you are so particular with this and that. We ourselves are not perfect anyway.

Elder Richard G. Scott made a great counsel “There is more to a foundation of eternal marriage than a pretty face or an attractive figure. There is more to consider than popularity or charisma. As you seek an eternal companion, look for someone who is developing the essential attributes that bring happiness: a deep love of the Lord and of His commandments, a determination to live them, one that is kindly understanding, forgiving of others, and willing to give of self, with the desire to have a family crowned with beautiful children and a commitment to teach them the principles of truth in the home. An essential priority of a prospective wife is the desire to be a wife and mother. She should be developing the sacred qualities that God has given His daughters to excel as a wife and mother: patience, kindliness, a love of children, and a desire to care for them rather than seeking professional pursuits. She should be acquiring a good education to prepare for the demands of motherhood. A prospective husband should also honor his priesthood and use it in service to others. Seek a man who accepts his role as provider of the necessities of life, has the capacity to do it, and is making concerted efforts to prepare himself to fulfill those responsibilities.”

From my own point of view here are the things that I consider for an eternal companion.

1. His love for the Lord. 
2. His attitude towards money.
3. His fondness of children. 
4. His love for his mother.

More Than Just a Mom

I came across an article in the January Issue of the New Era Magazine. One girl has been questioned why she only dreamed to be a housewife while she can pursue some prestigious careers.

There are also some folks who sometimes question me why I did not pursue my nursing career. As I think about it - yes indeed I reached far with my degree. I'm not bragging but I was able to graduate with latin honors in college. I was always been a diligent student.  I took up Nursing to pursue Medicine. I even took the NMAT already. Well, let's just say there are many significant experiences in my life that moved me not to pursue it.

There are simple joys  that really mean a lot that would lead us to prioritize what matters most in our lives. I still love Nursing. I will always do. It is always of great help. We have this subject Maternal and Child Care Nursing which I can still apply in my family.

Right now, we don't have a baby yet. But I love being a wife. I just stay at home since I also have a home based job. My world revolves around chores and preparing for my future family. Even if I did not really pursue my intended career, education will always give an edge to any person. It helped me to be a well rounded person who can compete with the demands of work.

Here's a very inspiring message from Elder D. Todd Christofferson

“Some view homemaking with outright contempt, arguing it demeans women. … They ridicule what they call ‘the mommy track’ as a career. This is not fair or right. We do not diminish the value of what women or men achieve in any worthy endeavor or career … but we still recognize there is not a higher good than motherhood and fatherhood in marriage. There is no superior career. … Whatever else a woman may accomplish, her moral influence is no more optimally employed than here.”

Personal Progress Over Again

Wiki defines  Personal Progress as a goal-setting and achievement program within the Young Women Organization of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This program is roughly analogous to the Scouting and Duty to God programs in which LDS young men are encouraged to participate.

I received a message from my mission companion to create a video of myself about my testimony of personal progress. The good thing is, I am still actually doing it all over again though I have finished it when I was in my teens. I reflected how this program has helped me.

I started doing it when I was 17 years old and still new in the Church. It made me appreciate more my identity as a daughter of Heavenly Father. It inspired me to be my best self as I strive to live the Christ like attributes. It did not only strengthen  me spiritually but it also instilled in me good habits that lead to my success. It really took a span of time before I was able to accomplish it considering that I was already in college. Self discipline helped me to go through all the projects and value experiences.

In this world full of deceptions from the adversary, Personal Progress can help all Young Women to be in the right track as it did to mine.